Friday, May 11, 2012

He  Will  Walk  With  You  |  Carey  Bailey

HTML Welcome  to  Pearl  GirlsTM  Mother  of  Pearl  Mother's  Day  blog  series  -­‐  a  week  long   celebration  of  moms  and  mothering.  Each  day  will  feature  a  new  post  by  some  of   today's  best  writer's  (Tricia  Goyer,  Sheila  Walsh,  Suzanne  Woods  Fisher,  Bonnie  St.   John,  and  more).  I  hope  you'll  join  us  each  day  for  another  unique  perspective  on   Mother's  Day.
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  He  Will   Walk  With  You  by  Carey  Bailey
  As  a  little  girl,  I  loved  baby  dolls.  Loved  them!  I  played  school,  adoption  agency,   daycare  operator  and  babysitter  all  day.  I  felt  like  I  was  born  to  be  a  mama.   Therefore,  I  was  a  bit  anxious  when  the  ages,  22,  25,  28  and  32  came  and  went  and   there  were  no  babies.  Have  you  ever  desired  something  so  much  and  feared  never   getting  it?  That  was  me.
  My  day  finally  came  at  the  age  of  34.  I  soon  realized  that  God  knew  what  He  was   doing  when  He  had  me  wait.  To  my  shock,  it  wasn’t  as  easy  as  playing  with  dolls.  I   was  surprised  that  it  wasn’t  the  dream  world  I  imagined  it  would  be!  I  felt  like  life   became  a  gigantic  prayer.
  “God,  HELP  me!”
  “Please,  God.  Please,  please,  please  make  it  all  better.  I  can’t  do  this!”
  “God,  this  feels  impossible.  Where  are  you?”
  While  I  adore  motherhood,  it  is  harder  and  there  are  more  adjustments  than  I   expected.  (I  am  hoping  there  are  some  nodding  of  heads  and  Amen’s  being  said   out  there  in  cyberworld.)  Not  only  did  I  have  a  new  life  to  care  for,  but  my  identity   suddenly  felt  all  scrambled  up.  It  took  me  until  my  son  was  one  to  finally  feel   confident  in  my  new  role  as  a  mother,  confident  that  I  could  drop  my  child  off  at   preschool  without  crying,  confident  that  I  could  go  out  with  the  girls’  and  the  world   wouldn’t  fall  apart,  and  confident  that  I  could  go  on  a  date  night  and  have   conversations  that  didn’t  revolve  just  around  our  son.
  I  was  feeling  settled  in  my  new  world  and  then  WHAM!  I  discovered  I  was  pregnant   again.  Can  I  be  vulnerable  with  you?  I  actually  cried  when  I  found  out.  And  they  were   not  tears  of  joy.  I  feel  awful  saying  that  out  loud,  and  I  hope  you  will  give  me  a   moment  to  explain.  It  was  not  that  I  didn’t  want  another  baby  or  feel  like  I  couldn’t   love  a  new  life,  it  was  just  that  I  got  scared.  Discovering  a  little  person  was  on  the   way  sent  a  panic  through  me.  Would  my  son  still  receive  the  love  and  attention  that   he  deserved?  How  was  my  husband  going  to  feel  about  my  body  changing  again?   Would  I  ever  be  able  to  pursue  the  vision  I  felt  God  had  for  me  in  writing  and   publishing?  I  was  truly  wondering  if  I  was  going  to  be  able  to  handle  another  intense   wave  of  identity  crisis  like  the  one  I  had  just  been  through.  I  wasn’t  sure.
  God  and  I  needed  a  serious  talk.  And  in  that  conversation  He  carefully  reminded  me   of  this:
  “For  I  know  the  plans  I  have  for  you,"  declares  the  LORD,  "plans  to  prosper  you   and  not  to  harm  you,  plans  to  give  you  hope  and  a  future.”  Jeremiah  29:11
  He  reminded  me  in  our  time  together  that  I,  too,  am  His  child  and  He  has  every   intention  of  loving  me,  caring  for  me,  and  giving  me  the  future  that  He  has  planned   for  me.
  As  mothers,  we  can  get  so  caught  up  in  parenting  that  we  forget  that  we,  too,  have  a   spiritual  parent  who  loves  us  as  His  child.  He  loves  you  as  much  as  He  loves  the   children  He  has  given  you.  He  will  never  forsake  you.   And  on  those  days   when  motherhood  seems  too  overwhelming  and  too  impossible  I  step  back  and  take   a  deep  breath.  Then  I  remember  that  this  journey  I  am  on,  right  now,  is  the  one  He   has  designed  and  create  uniquely  for  me.  I  simply  need  to  live  in  it,  learn  from  it,  and   allow  His  love  to  sweep  over  and  through  me.
  He  will  walk  with  me!  He  will  walk  with  you!  Grab  His  hand.
  Carey  Bailey  is  a  recovering  perfectionist,  wife,  proud  mama,  and  the  Family  Life   Director  for  her  church  in  Arizona.  She  hosts  an  online  community  for  moms  called   Cravings:  desiring  God  in  the  midst  of  motherhood  where  she  strives  to  make  God   time  easier.  Not  less  meaningful,  just  easier.  She  is  the  author  of  Cravings  {The   Devotional}  which  is  a  set  of  forty  devotional  flashcards  for  the  mama  on  the  go.   Visit  Carey  online  blog:  www.cravingstheblog.blogspot. com Facebook: ingsOnline  and Pinterest:
  Exciting  News  –  the  latest  Pearl  Girls  book,  Mother  of  Pearl:  Luminous  Legacies  and   Iridescent  Faith  will  be  released  this  month!  Please  visit  the  Pearl   Girls  Facebook  Page  (and  LIKE  us!)  for  more  information!  Thanks  so  much  for   your  support!

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